


Blue side

by Radami



Category: Football RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Copa América 2015, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Football | Soccer, Friendzone, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Uruguay National Team
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-14
Updated: 2015-11-14
Packaged: 2018-05-01 14:20:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5209106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Radami/pseuds/Radami
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bum-poking incident ruled Edinson Cavani out of Copa América 2015 which let the Uruguay NT suffered defeated by the host. Luis knew his friend was getting a very hard time, but he still hesitated if he were the right one Edi is in needed or not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blue side

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fan fiction I wrote in English. I'm not the native English speaker, but I hope my writing won't make you confused DX!

 

      Silence slowly spread all around the living room where Luis Suarez was sitting on sofa all alone in the dark when the last light from TV had just turned off a moment ago. He grabbed a cell phone, and slid his finger to find someone's number. But then he realized how his call might disturb or interrupt a contact between his dear friend and someone else.  He then threw his phone away like it was a very bad idea and bit his nails absent-minded, thinking of what he could do through this lonely night...... also thinking of what was on TV lately.

 

      He didn't really know whether he felt angry or disappointed about that absolutely disgusting gesture on the pitch where La Celeste ended their tournament ‘Copa America’ , but he sure knew that it was a massive negative feeling, too much that he want to burst out like crazy.

 

      If only he were there…..

 

      It was so damn hurt to watch his NT played along as an outsider, especially when seeing his team mates got stuck by a mess which he couldn't do anything. He even imagined if he were there, what he would do for......... oh well, didn’t it get worse enough?

 

      But just because it was Edinson Cavani, things went softer. Yes, it was as soft as it could be at that moment. As Edi was expulsed by his (very lightly) slap on Gonzalo Jara’s face. (Damn! That jerk again! If Luis were Edi, that Jarita would never got time to say good bye to the world.) , but his face when left the pitch was thing  Luis will never forget, that face which seems to be too calm for his situation.

 

      And still, Edi had no tears as always, thought he know Edi’s was burned inside.

 

      Luis had never seen his friend cried (and he hope not to) , nor showing any weakness .  He still wonder how strong this man is. If this fucking things happened to him, he would have bursted it out like a jerk and loser for sure.  And because he knew Edi inside out, he know that the word like 'stay strong' wouldn't suit him this moment.....Edi just perfectly strong by himself and might not need any help from him whom well-known as a forever kid that never had learned about how to control himself.

 

      But something told him that Edi needed help.

 

      Something told him that Edi was waiting for someone....like him.

 

      Luis reached out his hand to the phone once again, but still had no courage to click a dial-up button. He looked at Edi's smiley face on display in hesitate, his heart beated like there was a base drum played inside.  

 

      He didn’t really know why calling to Edi must be this hard, comparing to call to Diego Forlan for asking about his retirement form national team. Luis even called him immediately after his press conference ended. But for Edi’s, it seemed more far sensitivity than that.

 

      Or he was just afraid that the other man might refuse his call….refuse to talk to anyone else, or the worst one, just only him.

 

      Why showing how much he care about someone must be this difficult?

 

      Why it so difficult to comfort someone he...love?

 

      Suddenly, his phone rang by a call. His eyes opened wide when seeing its contact.

 

      _Fuck! It's him!_

_Edi!_

 

      What in the world this thing to happen!?

 

      “Hello dear? Are you OK?”  Luis quickly greeted Edi in worried. It’s not normal for him to answer the call from Edi. Because he was  the one who seemed always call his friend first. So it’s gotta be something wrong, if he didn’t be that over thinking.

 

      “.....Lucho” Edi’s voice seemed to be deeper than usual that Luis assumed he was sure.  “.....I… I thought you would call me.”

 

      Damn! It’s absolutly abnormal!

 

      “......Sorry Edi… I….I just…”

 

      “Did you watch it?” Edi interrupted.

 

      “....Sure , I watched” Luis sighted. But then realize to made conversation before Edi might be more frustrated. This poor thing had been through enough tonight. “Look, dear. You have done your best, haven’t you?  What you had done on the pitch was reasonable. I swear, all Uruguayan are on your side, not only tonight, but forever. So do I----”

 

      “........I’m afraid I haven’t said anythings, Luis”  Edi’s voice seemed to be deeper and calmer….no it seemed to be much colder.

 

      Luis gulped, and found himself shivered for a gap of conversation that made him felt like forever silenced.

 

      But then he heard Edi sighted and added.  “Nothing, Lucho….. I’m….I’m sorry.”

 

      “Eh?” Luis bursted out suddenly in stunning. Why Edi got to apologize him?  “For what!?”

 

      _Stupid! Luis! You are fucking stupid! You should have not ask him that, especially in this moment, you fucking idiot!_ \--- Luis even heard his voice screamed in his head.

 

      “For disappointing you. Lucho, no one blamed me that, but I felt guilty of being so useless. I’m such a real loser.....I can’t be you …..I really can’t be you , what they are expected to...”

 

_They...._

 

      Luis knew it well whom Edi talked about.  He gulped again when imagined how Edi felt right now…..

 

      No, he had been carrying this feeling since he joined national team.

 

      In Uruguay, there were many kids dreamed to be a football player who play for national team, the nation with 2 times winner in World cup and 15 times winner in Copa America. They even imagined of how they look when wearing jersey.  Luis and Edi sure knew this feeling well, because they used to be a kid, like any other kids in Uruguay.  

 

      But won 2 times in World Cups have never been this hard feeling until they joined national team. It gave them special feeling not only an honored to play for, but also pressure. The atmosphere of being underneath expectation was thing that will be haunted them every time they play, and will never disappear until they retired.

 

      It’s about the nation’s pride.

 

      But who else really care about their players’ feeling?

 

      Especially when Edi was criticized by many medias on how he play for these recent years. Not only on NT but also his club Paris Saint Germain. People sure believe that the old El Matador was death.  It seemed like his drop out of form disappointed himself enough, but it absolutely meant nothing comparing to what people talked about him behind.

 

      This critic seemed disturb his friend’s life every time he appeared on any medias, nor on his own personal social network accounts. Luis remembered how last week Edi got criticized by taking selfie with Diego Godin and his mate cup and people just commented like ‘more goal than mate please’. Edi really didn’t deserve this fucking things. Luis was sure that those comments on internet wouldn’t drive his friend mad, until Edi shot him a call this time.  His voice said it all how much those fucking things had affected his mind. …..He has just been through enough.

 

      He couldn’t imagine how depth is Edi’s painful right now….

 

      Before this silences took much long like forever, Edi finally start conversation again in falteringly.

 

      “But you know what?”

 

      “Huh?”

 

      “...I….I didn’t mean…. I didn’t mean to… stand on your place. But I….I did  want to….stand by your side….”

 

      “Edi…”

 

      Luis just repeated his name in stun, he wouldn’t know whether he felt better or even worse.

 

      “Without you……”

 

      Edi continued whit his voice that seemed obviously shake. He must be crying.

 

      “I...can do …….nothing…..really nothing….”

 

      Once again, Luis had no idea what to tell his mate who showed him how weak he is right now, the real Edi. It was pain in the ass to hear Edi cried without saying no more, he was just too numb to speak, too jerk to tell his dear friend that everything will be all right.

 

      But at the same time, he did really felt something he has never felt before (actually  he didn’t know if he should have this feeling or not especially in this moment when hearing his friend cried), he felt so warm in his heart. It was much warm to know that he is the one that Edi chose to divulge.

 

      ....That moment Luis understood why god creating such a thing we called 'freind'.

 

      Especially when Edi told him how much important he is…

 

      “Oh dear…” and that’s how he can say right now after being stunning. He himself always  wanted to console his dear friend immediately after the match. But then he realize how far his place and Chile is. If only he can fly or only he can teleport, Edi wouldn’t has to cry and will be curl in his tightening arm.

 

      “Sorry, I shouldn’t made you felt bad because of me.” said Edi in shaky voice and sniffed.

 

      “No! Edi, you can tell me anything! I’m here for you, dear!” Luis bursted.  “If only I can be with you tonight, if only I’m in Chile, I…I would hug you tightly. I would never let you crying alone like this!”

 

      What? What have I said???

 

      Once again, Luis heard his own voice screaming in his head, but it’s meant nothing comparing to the other sanctioned victim one’s crying. He was sure that his friend tried to hide it back, but not success.

 

      After long last deep breath and crying, Edi once tried to talk again.

 

      “I’m all right now, Lucho… I’m all right.”

 

      Luis had no idea what to say, but he know it’s his turn to say something, even stupid thing, just to show that he listened to the other man.

 

      “Yeah, good. You’ve got plenty things to do from now. So, be strong, mate.”

 

      “….Thanks”  Once Luis though that his friend was smiling, but must be a bitter smile. Then he felt blanked in his head.

      

      But it was Edi again who took place in changing the topic.        

 

      “By the way, how does it feel when watching national team as an outsider?”

_Jeez, this question!_

 

      Luiz hated this question, because he was always asked. He hated to say how his mind felt after knowing he was sanction from the biting incident since world cup.

 

      But it just because of Edi right now, so he tried not to take it too emotional.

 

      “Do you have no idea how painful it is?”

 

      “How do I know? I have never been banned....”

 

      And his friend’s answer just pissed him even more and thought why does his friend asked him such a stupid question.

 

      “Fuck! It’s no joke.”

 

      “No, I didn’t, I just want to know it really…..”

 

      Luis took a deep breath before answering the most annoying question once again after he was asked about 100 times from everyone in everywhere. But just because it was Edi, so he tried to make it even softer.

 

      “.....well , It’s hurt like hell and really lonely. Yeah, it’s really do that If you experience once you would have no feeling to bite someone anymore in the life time.”

 

      But then Luis realize that his friend won’t even think to do so, especially biting someone…. indeed this is just a case the god made it specially for only him. No one would repeat that.

 

      “...I see.”

 

      “Hey, sweetheart, don’t make this sound like you will be banned 9 matches as same as me! My sanction is just the worst one of the history that you will never taste once!”  Luis tried to make funny of it, even he felt hurt himself in every single words.

 

      “Sorry, I just….. didn’t mean about…that...”  Another sanctioned victim one’s voice was just lower and lower that Luis felt bad even more as if he said something wrong.

 

      “Then what?”

 

      It took like a minute to Edi to answer, like he was hesitated of confess such a thing.

 

      “......like watching the team as outsider…..”

 

      Luis even hear long deep breath from other man.

 

      “ ……..alone……..” said him finally.

 

      That loneliness in Edi’s voice was much strong that Luis confused if he should invite his friend over when national program come or not.

 

      But what about he refuse to? Will he the one who regret to ask such a thing?

 

      But if Edi want him to ask about that?

 

      “....Why won’t we watch it together next time then?”

 

      Then Luise decided to ask him that …. as Edi also did.

  
  


 

      “Eh?”

 

 

 

      They both were in silence of stunning a minute. Then laughed out loud after found they sharing the same idea.

 

      Then it was Edi who took it seriously and ask Luis which he will be stunning.

 

      “So? Will you come join me in Paris, or your place?”

 

      “Eh??? My place???”

 

      “Oh? It seem like I have to go now.” Edi interrupted, then Luis just realized that the match was just ended. He found how short in their conversation is and felt so lonely, much deep that he couldn’t imagine if he can sleep tonight.  “....so…. I’ll take that ‘my place’ as an answer, I will come to you in Barcelona when the next national program held. Thanks, see you there, dear.”

 

      “Eh? Wait! Will you? Seriously?? …....... Edi? … hey! Edi!?”

 

      It was so quickly that his head couldn’t process how it was going. His call was cut by Edi, who had decide to come to his place by himself, without asking any permission. Luis felt stunning for a while before put his cell phone on the desk next to him. Edi’s smiley face on the display still smiling an even sweeter smile to him. It made him realize what he should do for the very next months to hospitalize his friend when coming to his place.

 

      Luis smiled for the first time ever after this lonely night, at least he won’t be alone next time he watched his national team program.

 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I shipped them just because they are salteño XD I felt they have some sort of connection in these past years.  
> And again! Sorry for my English. Y u Y )) )


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